Ashly shares her story of coming back to The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints after a heroin addiction, and multiple stays in rehab and jail. Greg, shares his experience being with Ashly during her journey, and also his experience of losing his dad in a drowning accident at 15 years old, and how he has anchored his testimony to that experience.
Transcript
Ashly Stone
00:14
Hi, everybody, this is my first Podcast, episode one. So, I feel, you know, very new to this, but hopefully you can bear with me as I, as I learn how to be a podcaster. I really, you know, never would have saw myself as a podcaster. I noticed a common theme, when I started coming back to the church, that there was little, just miracles that would happen from Heavenly Father that were just little miracles that were pushing me and guiding me in that direction. And I started to listen to other people's stories with coming back to the church. And what I found was, many people had these similar experiences where they, they felt like they were witnessing little miracles, guiding them back to the church. And so, I this podcast purpose is really to highlight those stories of the experiences that people have coming back to the church, and it could look like anything, you know, we're open to any and all experiences, but I just I really wanted to put that out there. I think a lot of people today are leaving the church, and they're very loud about it. And an anchor in my life and guided me in so many ways. And he's amazing, and everybody loves my dad. If you're from Southern Utah, you probably know my dad, because he's famous, and he's the coolest guy ever. So, anything else you want to add to that introduction, Dad?
Greg
01:52
No, I think you overstated it, way overstated it, but just know I'm glad that you're excited to do this. And I think it's I think it's very necessary.
Ashly Stone
02:06
So, a little bit about me, I like I said, I'm in recovery from a heroin addiction, not only heroin, but pretty much any other substance under the sun. Growing up, we were raised in the church, my my parents, they were, you know, active church members. I was I had a testimony at a young age of the gospel. When I was in middle school, I started to, you know, stray away from the church, and I started to kind of go down my own path. And I was experimenting with drugs and alcohol, which led to me kind of falling off the deep end with that. I went to an adolescent facility when I was 16. I was there for 15 months, and I didn't really reestablish a spiritual connection. I kind of did, but not really, just shortly after, I was addicted to heroin. And I was in jail, I was in rehab. Rehab after rehab. It led me to living in a house in Arizona, where it was a drug house, there was a family that lived there, my boyfriend, his parents were using and selling drugs, my boyfriend's brother, the whole family was on drugs. And that was kind of my life was just using drugs, finding ways to get drugs. That was my that was what my whole life revolved around. And finally, I got sick of living that life and I called my dad and I said, Dad, I need help. Can you come get me? And he drove down to Arizona and he picked me up from this drug house. And he, we kind of had a rough… How long was that after you picked me up?
Greg
03:53
It was probably a good week before we ended up getting to where we were going, which we didn't really know where we were going. But we eventually we went where we needed to be.
Ashly Stone
04:06
I ended up going to the Salvation Army in Fresno, California and after being in Mesa, Arizona for my you know, through all my running and gunning. And what, why the Salvation Army? Like how did we get to that point? How did we?
Greg
04:25
Well, we'd been to multiple rehab facilities and, and every time you go to a rehab, they obviously they want a huge deposit. Got to work out all of the mechanics of how you can get admitted. This time was a little bit different. Kind of stemmed off of to be honest, I didn't know if you were going to live or die. But um, but I do know,
Greg
05:13
that we were guided by the Spirit. And by your testimony of the gospel of Jesus Christ. That's one thing that, that I've always been amazed is, I just know that you have one of the strongest testimonies. You know, the Savior is real. And you know, the Atonement is real. And you understand that the church is not the people in the church, but it's, it's the love that our Savior has for each of us. And it’s his desire that we go down the road that that would make us the happiest, and I, I know that you, you understood that. But I remember getting in that car, not knowing where we were going to go and trying to leave Phoenix, Arizona multiple times, and just the different connections that you had there. And when you would disappear, and we would stop, which seemed like after a full day and you would disappear and call your your friends and you would think just one more time. I just need to get high one more time. And then you would get back in and we'd start over again. But I knew that if we just listened and prayed, followed the Spirit, that Heavenly Father wants, he wanted what was best for all of us. And at that time, I didn't know, I didn't know how it would turn out. But I think that your love for our, our Heavenly Father and our Savior is what propelled you to do what is one of the most incredibly difficult things on this earth. That led to the, to the point where you are now and that's the hard thing, I guess, in any kind of a venue like this, is to relate to people that, that it is about why we want to be a part of the gospel of Jesus Christ on this earth. And I think the way that people feel what they perceive as being judgments that other people have about them, which I've grown to learn over the years. It's sad, because the beauty of the gospel and the love of our Savior, the happiness that he wants us to have is more. It's bigger than any of the things that we as individuals feel that we're being judged because I honestly believe that people, they really don't, ya know if they if they judge it, it's just that they're people, that they're just people that the Savior's church is here on the earth. And He wants us to return to Him and to be happy. And I think that, that he he's done everything for us. We just need to realize that if we just give him a little bit of our time, we can get to know Him, we can return to live with him again.
Ashly Stone
08:39
You said that you think people judging it's, you know, what they perceive as judging. Did you ever have like, okay, so we also have in our family, my sister, Aubrey who she, which I got her permission to share this, but she was 16 when she got pregnant, and she was a student at the high school where my dad taught at and that, you know, is a challenging thing to overcome. I mean to have in your life as a teenager, you know, obviously, we have seen that turned into an amazing miracle. And we that little baby that she was pregnant with is our you know, he's 16 now and he's just the best addition to our family. We could have never; we could never imagine life without him. But when you were going through that with Aubrey, she had a teen pregnancy, you have a daughter that's very rebellious. And just you know, I also was at the high school snow Canyon High School in St. George my dad taught and I was just about as naughty as you can be for a high school student and just ditching class and drinking, getting caught drinking at school, all kinds of stuff. Just not, you know, not really proud of who I was back then. But do you feel like you faced judgment from, you know, people in the church or when we were going through all of that stuff as a family? What was your experience with members of the church or just your experience in church in general at that time?
Greg
10:20
You know, I, I wouldn't say that at that time that, that I had the strongest, I had a testimony and that it wasn't anything even remotely close to what it is now. But I don't, it was a difficult time. I know that your mother didn't want to tell me that Aubrey was pregnant, she was worried that with the way that I would react, she was completely wrong, because I, I just wanted her to be happy. I was sad that she missed out on a lot of the experiences that when you’re going through something that difficult, at that age in life, it just makes you grow up really, really quickly. But I don't think I ever felt any judgment from anyone. Only, only the desire that, that everybody worked through whatever decision we would make, I never felt any anything but support from friends and from teachers. And to this day, I have some of the greatest friends, they know all my children, and they love all my children. And they, they always ask me how you're doing all of you. But they have always been like that. And I just think that too often that we perceive one thing when the complete opposite is what is actually taking place. I think generally speaking, most people don't, number one that they don't have time to be judgmental. And all they want to do is live their lives and be happy. It's taken me a lifetime, up to this point, obviously, I'm almost 60 years old, and to realize that, that all the gospel has ever taught is for us to be happy. The things that we think, make us happy often times don't make us happy. But they're the what Heavenly Father, through his, his very inadequate servants on the earth have told us to do certain things, and we can be happy. But I know that nobody is perfect. Only the Savior was the ever only the ever-perfect person that was on the earth. And I truly believe that if we could just give the Savior what he's asking us to give him that we, the love and happiness that we could have, it's incomparable to anything on this earth. And that's one thing that I have learned, you were going through all your, your struggles, and your little sisters, it was a it was a tough time in life. But I just know that this life. It was not meant to be easy. It was meant to have challenges and trials. And those trials make us better people.
Ashly Stone
13:22
Okay, obviously there are people who you have this prime situation to be judged by people in the church, you know, you've got a daughter who's a heroin addict, you've got a daughter who's pregnant in high school, you have this, you know, we did not fit the mold of perfect church going family. What advice would you give to somebody that's going through a similar situation? Maybe they have a child that's gay, and they feel like they, you know, are being judged by that, or maybe a child that's transgender? Or maybe they have a daughter that's pregnant or a heroin addict daughter or whatever? What? What would you say to families that feel like they need to distance themselves from the church because they feel like people just don't get it in the church or they feel judged? What, what would you say to those families?
Greg
14:17
I would say that, I know, without a doubt that that some of what they feel is probably justified from their perspective. But I also know that the very thing that they that I would advise them to do is the very thing that that Satan would tell them not to do. And that's to run with open arms. Embrace the gospel, to feast on the on the fruits of the Atonement. Because in the big scheme of things, as I already said, there is no person that doesn't have challenges and trials in life and doesn't feel judged. You can ask your mom, I probably make the always been more paranoid about people judging me that I've gotten over that it doesn't, it doesn't matter anymore. It's like I, the things that matter are you, your family, your happiness. You know, one thing that I have discovered is that people that leave the church, for whatever reason, I know, a lot of times, not always, but a lot of times they think that it's harder, it's more difficult to, to be in the church than to be out of the church. And, and I just, I just think that knowing what I know now, having lived what I've lived, that the very thing that they should be running from they should be running to with open arms to embrace. I just think, if they go away, where will they go? There's not anything in the world that can give them more peace and happiness and love than the gospel of Jesus Christ.
Ashly Stone
16:25
You said that when you when we were in high school, and you were kind of going through all of that stuff, you said that your testimony isn't what it is today? What do you feel like helped push you towards, or what kind of encouraged you to work on your testimony and make your testimony stronger, or what led to that?
Greg
16:44
I think the things that, that we perceived as being super important in our lives, that they're not as important, at least, to me at that time, they weren't as important as the things that that should have been important. And, you know, we always say that, if we could go back and do it over again, we do it differently. And, and there's no question that I would do things differently. If I went back and went through my life again, I probably wouldn't have, like, still probably would have been a teacher and gone down that road. But, that's the whole purpose of life is to learn as you go along. And I know that, obviously, the time that you can spend with each other on this earth with your family and your, what I would change is, and it's not, I don't think in my own situation, it necessarily has anything to do with, with feeling judged or anything like that. But I do know, on a daily basis, just in my profession, I love all my students. And I always think that I have the greatest job in the world. But I know that everybody has their, their challenges in life and their struggles. And I just wish that we could take all of our, our struggles and our challenges and just set them aside and try to enjoy this incredible, earthly experience that we're having and the opportunities that have been placed before us. And I just feel like a lot of the decisions that we sometimes make; they keep they keep us from the happiness that we can have at that time. And I feel like I missed out on a lot of the happiness that I could have had during that time of life. I'm trying to make up for it. My family's made up for it millions of times over and ah, with the decisions that they've made, and just the way that the story is turning out. It wasn't the story that I you know; I wasn't too sure of the ending there for quite a while.
Ashly Stone
18:58
So, we kind of like put a pin in the in the story of the Salvation Army and going to treatment. So, let's go back to that for a second.
Greg
19:06
We jumped in and we were in for the long haul.
Ashly Stone
Yep, we drove from Phoenix to…
Greg
19:13
Well, we drove from Phoenix to Flagstaff. You had another prescription that you wanted to get filled for Adderall. We wouldn't fill it. And so, we had to drive back to Phoenix and you told me just to leave you there by the dumpster. You were always a heroin addict and never gonna change and it was breaking my heart to jump back in and we decided that's when we went to the Waffle House and that's when our adventure began and the next day or day and a half. You did your fingernails for 30 hours in the car with a little buffer and the details of all of our stories. I look back on it now and I'm just I'm amazed that I look at this incredible, beautiful grandchildren, amazing husband, and I just know that there's only one way that that ever could have happened.
Ashly Stone
Yeah.
Greg
That’s through the atonement.
Ashly Stone
20:22
Yeah. And I, it's true. If you knew me back then I was a totally different person than I am today. I, my siblings especially can attest to this, I was horrible. I was, you know, very mean, and just selfish. And, you know, everything I did was just pretty much out of, you know, just self-serving motives. And so, my dad dropped me off. I was in a 10-day detox a cold turkey detox in Fresno, California. And then he, and then he came back and got me and took me to the Salvation Army. When I got to the Salvation Army, I did not know if I could do it. It was 40 hours of work in the warehouse. And I didn't know if I had it in me to do it, I was used to treatment centers that were very cush and you just kind of hang out and go to group and therapy and whatever. But this was a treatment center where I was working 40 hours a week. And I was just like, I don't know if I can do this. And they also they had their own religion, that they we had a church service Wednesdays and Sundays. And when I first got there, I was just like, I don't know, like, I don't know if I can do this. And it was just so foreign to anything that I had ever known and, and then the preacher brought me the chaplain, he brought me into his office, and he said, “Ashly, choose a Bible to use while you're here”. And so he had this shelf with a whole bunch of Bibles on it, and I'm like, I chose the pink Bible. And he hands it to me, and I opened this Bible up, and there's a Book of Mormon bookmark in this Bible. And it might not sound that crazy to anybody listening to this, but the chance of me picking that Bible with that Book of Mormon bookmark in it in Fresno, California. I'm the only member of the church in this whole facility of 150 people. And there is no denying that that was Heavenly Father saying Ashly, like you are right where you're supposed to be. On the bookmark, it said, read the articles of faith. And so I went back to my room that night and read the articles of faith. And I read, “if there's anything lovely of good report, or praiseworthy, we seek after these things”, and I kind of took that as my, my sign that I was supposed to be there because we had heard really good things about salvation army that they had the highest success rate in the nation and all these other things that I thought, this is it, I'm supposed to be here. Do we still have that bookmark Dad, or that Bible?
Greg
23:08
I think we do. In fact, I've got all your journals and everything that we were always going to write our book and
Ashly Stone
23:18
We still need to. Coming soon book. Um, but anyway, so that was one of those things that I felt like kind of was a sign that I, you know, needed to come back. So I went through the program, and towards the end of my program, I got a email from it was actually the librarian of my adolescent facility that I went to when I was 16. He was a friend of my aunt Dana's, he sent me an email and said, Ashley, if you read the Book of Mormon, every single day, I promise you'll never go back to your old life. At this point, I was like, you know what, I have nothing to lose. I have nothing to my name. I'm in rehab. And I had been to rehab how many times I've been to rehab and detox like 15? 20? Like,
Greg
24:09
I just remember you smuggling heroin out of two or three of them. And being one of the most wanted in Washington County, Utah, picking you up on the streets of Las Vegas. You’ve been to many, many, many.
Ashly Stone
24:23
Yes, I have. And so, I had nothing to lose like I'm, you know, I'm in my 20th rehab, and, you know, my parents, they didn't have a lot of hope. Well, not that you didn't have hope. But just based on previous results, we didn't know what exactly was going to happen. And so, I decided I'm going to take a chance on what he just promised me and I'm gonna see what happens. And so, I have literally read the Book of Mormon, every single day since I got that email message nine years ago, and I am here to testify that it he was right and it was true. And since then, I've found a quote from President Nelson that says, “If you read the Book of Mormon” or sorry, “if you daily immerse yourself in the Book of Mormon, you will be immunized against the evils of the day, including pornography and other mind-numbing addictions”. And I thought, you know what? That is, it's true. It's totally transformed my life and given me the power to overcome some of those challenges that I had. Moving on, I got home I went to my I was in St. George with my parents living at home. This was the test, you know, was I going to do it was I going to keep going and I decided that I was just going to do this experiment, I was going to experiment and see what happened if I got my temple recommend, my limited use recommend, to go do baptisms with the singles ward that I was in. And so, I did everything I had to do. I had to quit smoking, and I had to quit chewing the Nicorette gum that I used to quit smoking, and I had to quit drinking coffee, and I had to go through the repentance process and do all of these things with my bishop. And I finally got my limited use temple recommend. And it had been the first time that I was, you know, able to do that, and many years since I was probably 10. So, I went to the temple with my singles ward. And I was kind of expecting this big, light shining moment, but I just really, I got there and I was kind of like, you know, there's not like some big like flash of light that's happening right now. But I do feel better than I did before so, I'm just going to kind of keep going with this. So, one of the things that happened when I posted my podcast on Instagram and kind of shared why I was doing it, sharing stories of people and coming back to the Gospel, I got a lot of hate, and I was not really expecting that. But I got a lot of people that were sharing, you know, a lot of dislike for the church and experiences like that, and people sharing that they had trauma from the church. And it made me realize, you know, I'm not here to invalidate anybody's experience. But I it made me realize that it is important for me to share my experience, because I think there's a lot of pieces that are really, you know, there's a lot of things that get very loudly, you know, shouted from the rooftops about things that people don't like about the church. And so, I really wanted to share my experience because truly, I had a lot of trauma from my experiences as a drug addict and overcoming an eating disorder. And I was able to have hope throughout that experience because of the gospel. And coming back to church was the only thing that helped me when I had tried everything else. And so, I just think it's important that we are able to have a voice and share how the church has been such a blessing in our lives.
Greg
28:07
I've actually had several that I always go back to but one in particular that that sticks out was my dad being very, very faithful and devout. He wouldn't travel on Sunday, and we had planned a big fishing trip for all the boys up in north of Winnipeg on a on a lake called Cross and Cedar Lake in Canada. And I remember that my dad would not leave on the on the Sabbath. So, we all gathered in the church parking lot at midnight and 12:01am the following day, on an August morning and 1980, began our journey north to go on this fishing trip that was we'd talked a lot about it and were excited. The boys were all excited. And that trip that I would take with my dad, I was actually the only one that was in the vehicle with my dad and we were in his Ford F150 pickup and obviously everybody was tired. And we were driving through the night to get to this favorite fishing place that we had north of well north of Winnipeg, that that he would end up drowning on this trip. That experience would, it would change my life in ways that at the time I I obviously had no idea. But I remember on that trip, when I was talking to my dad on the way to this lake in in Canada. He said, “There's three things that I want you to do.” Almost like he kind of knew that. That something was going to happen. I don't know. I don't think that he did. But he told me that. First of all, he wanted me to be an Eagle Scout and that wasn't ever anything that I really was that enthused about. The other thing that he said was that he wanted me to continue and get an education after high school. The third thing that he mentioned to me was that he wanted me to be sealed in the temple. I just vividly remember that conversation because I know, because of the tragic accident that happened, we got caught in a blizzard. It was 80 degrees on an August morning, in 1980 and as I stated, and the temperature dropped to below freezing, and there was a horrible storm that came in on this lake and my father was in a boat with my best friend and my little brother, and the boat capsized, and he drowned. But I will never forget that conversation. And I go back to that often in my in my life, for a lot of reasons. Because I know that I would not be where I am today had that one tragic event not happened. I wouldn't be married to that an incredible, incredible woman. Often our because of some trial, or some adversity that we have, that make us who Heavenly Father wants us to become. And I think that that one event and that that conversation that I had with my dad, that that kind of guided me in my life. I mean, I did end up becoming an Eagle Scout, but like the day before my 18th birthday. I did continue my education, I go to school, pretty much every day still, as a as a teacher. I did marry the love of my life and was sealed in the St. George temple. And I know that the blessings that have been showered upon me are blessings that I could, I could never have imagined. At the time it was it was just a trial. And there were a lot of reasons to blame or wish for other things. But the gospel of Jesus Christ is what has held me on the right path for my entire life. I could never in a million lifetimes thank my Heavenly Father enough for the blessings that He has given me.
Ashly Stone
32:25
Do you think that after grandpa Sheldon died, did you ever struggle with your faith after that? Like, did you ever think, you know, surely after that happened, did you ever struggle or blame God? Or was that, did that cause any crisis of faith for you after that? Or do you think it helped strengthen your faith? Because that happened like immediately after.
Greg
32:54
Well, I think immediately after, I think, one thing that the Holy Ghost does, in the greatest times of trial in our life is he insulates us from the reality of our situations. And he makes it possible for us to continue and to persevere. And I'd have no question that the Holy Ghost was probably stronger in my life at that time than it's ever been. But I don't I've never I never blamed God, ever. I, I do know that I had some experiences after that are very personal to me that I won't share here that without a doubt, bore witness to me that the Gospel is true. And I know where my father is my earthly father, and I know what he's doing. I just wish that everyone had the times that their faith is tried the most if they had a little bit more vision into the future, to see what Heavenly Father will help them obtain and help guide them toward, if they can hang in there a little bit longer. I know I've mentioned previously, as we talked about this podcast, this talk by Elder Corbridge about Stand Forever, how he was assigned to the general authority to wade through all of the muck and the mire of all the anti LDS literature and, and how it was one of the works worst and darkest experiences of his life. You know, he talks about the primary questions that the gospel addresses in the secondary questions and he says if you believe in the primary questions, the secondary ones don't even matter. And obviously the primary ones, some of them, are believing that Jesus Christ is our Savior, and that the Prophet Joseph Smith was a prophet. And despite the fact that the Prophet died when he was 38 years, he was martyred when he was 38 years old, and my father drown, when he was 38 years old, and I, I often think of the Prophet Joseph Smith, and knowing that he was just a young man, and to think of everything that went on in his life, and what he was able to accomplish. He’s the one individual that our Heavenly Father chose at that time to bring forth the Book of Mormon in our day, to restore the gospel on the earth. If anybody ever really gives that serious thought, it's, it's almost impossible, that he did what he did. And it just strengthens my testimony, all the more to know that this incredible human that was subjected to all the imperfections of all of us the same imperfections that we had, that he was able to do what he did, in spite of all of the trials of the fiery darts of the adversary from every direction. And I just think that we're we live in a time of luxury and ease, and that we are given so much. But it's also the most difficult time that I think has ever existed in the history of the world. I think it's, it's, it's the easiest in a lot of ways, but it's the most difficult. And if we could just know that our Heavenly Father is there to guide us and point us in the right direction and the Atonement is real. And I know with without any doubt at all that that our Savior will return to the earth. He will rule and reign on the earth for 1000 years. I know that that time is coming closer. I'm just so grateful to live at the time that I live and to have what I have.
Ashly Stone
37:13
Thank you so much, dad for sharing your all of your wisdom with everybody and thank you for just being you. You are amazing. And I love you so much and I'm so grateful. You're my dad.
Greg
37:25
I'm grateful you're my daughter and I wouldn't trade you for any other daughter in the world.
Ashly Stone
All right.
Greg
I love all my daughters and I've got the greatest son a person could ever have. I love you very much.
Ashly Stone
I love you.
